The Countdown...

The house is quiet. A bird outside and the sniffing of AJ (one of our pugs) at my feet under the desk, are the only sounds to be heard. It's an unusual quiet, but a welcomed one in the crazy life that Tracy and I lead. A life, that as of late, has been anything, but quiet. My heart longs for peace, solitude, and a visit from an old friend...I think his name is "inspiration". The well isn't dry, but it's definitely not gushing.

A few months ago I was given the opportunity of a lifetime. As a Christian growing up I've read stories from the bible and tried so hard to picture in my mind what the setting was like. Trying always to picture a different land in my mind's eye, but only knowing what I'd seen and what had been told to me or shown to me in pictures. Well in 10 days the journey begins as 40 people from our church family and I head to Israel.

I sit here and ponder what to pack knowing that all I've really accumulated so far is the converters for the electrical outlets. Important, but I'm pretty sure I should take other stuff too. With all the hustle and bustle in preparation for this trip I find myself thinking about the things this trip might help me unpack.

It has been a trying season in our home. Tracy's still on the mend from her surgery last October. In trying to be the "knight in shining armor" I've realized there's no battle to fight and I'm ill equipped to fix what has been broken inside of her. Only God can, and only God will. I'm to only listen and support, and wait and trust (difficult things for any man). It's left me feeling many things; inadequate, confused, angry, pained, worried, challenged, powerless, and weak. However, one feeling remains that I've felt from the beginning...HOPE.

I don't think Israel will be a trip that will somehow make all that better. In fact, it's definitely going to be hard to be away from my girl for two weeks. It does me good, however, to know that she will be traveling to visit a good friend in New York while I'm gone, and I know that trip will do more healing than almost anything else I could've got her for her birthday. Time away will break the fallow ground for us both.

"sow for yourselves righteousness; reap steadfast love; break up your fallow ground, for it is time to seek the LORD"
                                       -Hosea 10:12

As I prepare for this trip, this scripture has been stirring in my heart. That's what my heart has felt like. Fallow. Like a field that hasn't been plowed for planting in a long time. Now, I must admit, I'm never excited about the plowing process, but I know brokenness is required of me from the Lord for Him to do a new work in my life.

I read an article yesterday saying that Israel has been in a record drought since 2003. The Sea of Galilee has dropped in it's level about 5 yards because of the pathetic rainfall (as a Coloradan I can kinda understand what this is like). Well, after 8 years of drought, this year they have seen record rainfall. In fact 29 days of rain last month. They haven't seen this much rain in 65 years. The Sea is even up a half yard.

Things I do know from reading the bible growing up are; deserts are a part of life's seasons, fallow land will reap new growth and trials are temporary because God is faithful.

"Behold, I am doing a new thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it? I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert."

                                      -Isaiah 43:19